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Rhinoplasty Nose Surgery
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Question: For me I am unable to date, form close friendships, or deal with
authority figures. I have no trouble going out in public or dealing with
any anonymous situation or strangers
Answer: i just realized recently that i have social phobia or
agoraphobia..i think it all started in my first yr at college....When i found out that some of the grrls on my floor in my dormitory
found out that i was gay..i think i went on a nervous breakdown, more or
less...i got so paranoid, ya have no idea..it started in oct 98 and it
continued on..most of the girls on my floor are these stuck-up sorority grrls
who are so fake and obnoxious..cant believe i picked this floor..but anyway..at
that time, i really wanted to fit in with them..i also got into a sorority..but
then i quit going since i felt paranoid that maybe the other girls knew that i
was gay....it really hurt..it really did..i stayed in my
room alot..stopped going out...missed alot of classes...ate very little..slept
alot..went to counseling every thursday..felt like killing myself..and the list
goes on..Some homophobic, narrow-minded girls continued to harrass me every
other day..it was unbearable considering the fact that i hated to be gay..THIS
experience is prolly what did it..it prolly caused my social phobia to what it
is now..i mean, i was a bit shy before..but now i hate going to new places,
meeting new ppl, keeping jobs more than a week, going to school, grocery
store..even driving..it just makes me mad what they girl TARA..did to me..all
those teasings..SIGH
I was reading through websites on this disorder and i'm shocked to see that
once it begins, it's hard to stop?..is that true..i wish i could just wake up
one day and not be scared anymore..
another problem..is that i hate my nose..i think it's big..but everyone i asked
doesnt think so..shrug..dunno..but i did recently had a rhinoplasty..nose job
last month..and i think i like it..
but maybe all this stems from low self-esteem?
my other prob is talking to new ppl..even in groups..i think they're staring at
my nose or even figuring out that i'm actually gay..i get so nervous and i get
sweaty palms, i blush alot..i cant breath..i feel like i'm suffocating..Gawd,
how i wish i could be those ppl who could just walk into a grocery store or
walk up to ppl without feeling any pangs og anxiety..that would be grand..i
hope i'm not like this forever!..this is getting to long so i guess i'll stop
right now
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